I haven't wrote on here in a while, things have been hectic and when my brain goes on overload I tend to lose my inspiration for a little while. But, I found something that needs to be said, something that is too important to me not to be said................
Mothers everywhere this is for you..........................
From the moment most women learn that they are carrying a new life, the worries begin. How am I going to do this? Will I be a good mother? Can I give my child a happy life?
All these questions are legitimate, because we can only hope right? Well this will continue for the rest of our life's, because a mother's work is never done. We can constantly berate our own parenting skills because of our child's tears. We will make mistakes, but only because that fantasized handbook we all wanted never does appear. Although, the mistakes are made naturally for lack of better knowledge at the time we will still condemn ourselves to that dreaded name, "Bad Mother."
When we must be strong and teach our children right from wrong (wow I rhymed), the kids or anyone else for that matter will never know we are normally sitting behind a door somewhere crying our eyes out wondering if we have done the right thing. Sometimes we have to take a break and we will feel useless as parents for this need. They're my children why should I need a break? We shed many tears in the name of parenthood. We call ourselves names. We say all these things to ourselves, but we forget that those tears, these worries, and the fear, are what prove we are good mothers. We forget that the number one thing in being a good mother means that you care.
And this is where we get twisted. Sometimes, we must say no. No is a word that can be horrible to tell your own offspring, in the face of their tears and their words. We must say this sometimes, though, for their protection, their safety, their health, their maturity, and even their future feelings. The term, "I've been there," is often thought of when we save their feelings. We are the ones who must help our children to grow and learn to survive on their own. At times, we have to be the bad one, the mean one, the unfair one, just so we can save our children from themselves. Then in the end we shut the door, cry, call ourselves horrible mothers, and wonder why we can't always make our children happy.
This is what should tell us we are good mothers, though. We care and we cry. We forget that there are mothers out there who don't do these things. That could care less if their child cries. That allow all just to make them not cry, those who don't protect them. Those who can't stand up against the pain of being told by our children that they hate us for saying no. We are good mothers because we bear the burden of our child's tears. Their tears become our tears. In the end, we do what's best for our kids. It hurts, but we bear the pain for our children just as we did when we brought them into this world.
I will leave this with a story I found and though it makes reference to God I think we can all take something from this story. We are good mothers, even when we think we are not. I can't say that what I am writing will make any of us change our minds, but I hope it can sometimes remind us of why we feel the way we do and that in the end we are good mothers. We are just doing are best.
~ Tears of a Woman ~
"Mom Why are you crying?"
"Why are you crying?" he asked his mom.
"Because I'm a woman" she told him.
"I don't understand," he said.
His mom just hugged him and said, "and you never
will"..........
Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does
mother seem to cry for no reason?"
"All women cry for no reason," was all
his dad could say........
The little boy grew up and became a man,
still wondering why women cry...
Finally he put in a call to GOD; when GOD got on the
phone the man said, "GOD, why do women cry so
easily?"
GOD said.......
When I made women she had to be special. I made her
shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the
world; yet, gentle enough to give comfort....
I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and
the rejection that many times comes from her
children......
I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going
when everyone else gives up and take care of her
family through sickness and fatigue without
complaining......
I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under
any and all circumstances, even when her child has
hurt them very badly...
This same sensitivity helps her to make a child's
boo-boo feel better and shares in their teenagers
anxieties and fears.......
I gave her strength to carry her husband through his
faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his
heart.
I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never
hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and
her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.
I gave her a tear to shed, It's hers exclusively
use whenever it is needed. It's her only
weakness....It's a tear for mankind.......
~Author Unknown~
